YSL: Poetry Friday, Week 10

Counting
If this wee little ditty
followed the rules of haiku instead
of simple stupid rhythm
it might go something like this:

line one (that's five) is the number of beers
I drank on Tuesday
line two (that's seven) is the number of beers
I drank
if you combine Tuesday and Thursday
line three is trickier--
there's math involved--
we're back to five, but subtract its lesser, four--
and you get the number
of glasses of water I drank
between the two nights

Add it all up--
seven, five, seven--
and you get the number of times
I smacked myself upside the head
for indulging my more nefarious side.

It's probably better
To not consider haiku
Yours truly is a wee bit hungover,
but the pool today was faboo.

Short-lived Glory
I passed someone today
And then I noticed he was doing
The backstroke

Weather
they say it's going
to snow tomorrow
i think i am in hell.

Queenliness
Freddie says he loves
to ride his bicycle, dear--
I wonder if Freddie ever tried
This one-legged pedaling drill?
If so I bet he'd say something like,
"I want to hurt my biiiicycle,
I want to hurt my ride."
It's a good thing
for the sake of music
That Freddie wasn't coached by Mike.